Like many people, I have had many challenges in my life. The not so unfamiliar volatile upbringing, violence, abuse, rape, traumatic sudden and untimely death of my brother, unhealthy relationships which lead to low self-esteem and confidence, which I disguised under a bravado of fake confidence/arrogance to ignore and bury the hurt.

I was in constant pain, numbing it through distractions and denial and when it got too much, projecting it on to others. Or I bulldozed my way through the pain, intent on building the perfect life. In fact on reflection, life hadn’t been effortless, it had been a hard slog trying to control every aspect, and I was fragile from the sheer effort of trying to create a seemingly perfect life.

But I did it. I had it all…. Or so I thought.

I had accumulated all the things that, according to society define a successful and happy life. Don’t get me wrong, I appreciated the life I had and have memories of phenomenal experiences, but aside from the children, it seemed empty and meaningless. I was deeply unhappy and it felt like there was a huge gaping hole inside of me. All the ‘stuff’ that I thought would make me happy didn’t. I had spent my entire life avoiding my deep-rooted emotional baggage and it had caught up with me. I was terrified, angry, anxious, frustrated, sad and hurt. I didn’t know who I was or what I wanted and I felt alone and lost.

I realised that I needed to find the courage to face the pain so that I could find my way to happiness. I have always wanted to help people, and I had always had the ability to see and sense hurt in others, but I had to develop compassion and empathy for myself first.

I trained in various therapies to work through my own emotional map. This painful but enlightening personal journey has given me a deep level of understanding and empathy to work with my clients.

For years I’d felt as if I had been wearing a mask. Gradually peeling back the layers, getting to know who I really was, and reconnecting with my intuition enabled me to fully step into the real, free-spirited, fearless and authentic me and for the first time in my life went from living on the outside (trying to fix it) to truly belonging - to myself.